It started many years ago with pain and suffering that doctors had no idea what the cause was. It included migraines, muscle spasms, and everything neurologically that comes with migraines. ( nausea, vomiting, bed care) . I was 27.
For me it was the start of a relationship I never could have anticipated with come to me ...ever. My relationship with pain. For me the pain started as a physical pain yes but the more years that passed by and the longer it stuck around it became depression and despair at all I had lost due to pain.
Many will understand I am sure, what it is like to be fine one moment and have the onset of something so serious and so life changing that you become someone else. The person you were without suffering or pain is no longer there. You barely remember what that person was like. In wishing things could change you search and search for a remedy or even just an analgesic to ease the agony but such things are just fairy dreams.
When you realize that you must accept this status change you go about altering how you do things in your life and how much you are able to do in a day. You simplify and it seams to help.
Now having given up so much--carrier, sex, physical activity, and a carefree style I am forced to search within myself to find my inner peace with the cards I have in my hand now.
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